Swell of burdens

It's peculiar the way that carrying out can usher in:

I've seen a swell of burdens 
carried out the door.
Burdens that fill bags--
   literally fill bags--
beautiful bags that sat at
cross purposes.

I saw a beautiful being
tote those beautiful bags,
swelling with burdens,
out my front door.

Such a sight and such a sensation.

20 thoughts on “Swell of burdens

      • Yes, that’s it – I like the accentuation in the bit after “Burdens.” Just a quick question here if you don’t mind, I’m still new to the poetic form – what role does indentation play in poetry? I have seen it being used to great effect here on WordPress but I’m not sure about how to use it for myself in my own poems…

        Liked by 1 person

      • Well I cannot speak for anyone else, but I can speak to why I use it. Normally I employ indentation when I want a pause, whether it’s being read aloud or read in one’s mind, I’m stressing a pause in that area so they dwell on the thought for a second or two.

        I’ll also use indentation if it fits the form of my poem in some specific way. For example, in my piece “Uncle Charlie fell ill with a dyspeptic violence,” I use the indenting to represent each 3 line segment as if it is coming from a different perspective. The first being one voice in the head, the second being another and the third set of lines being the resolution of the first two.

        There’s no hard and fast rule(s) and I try to use them only where they actually aid the interpretation of the poem. Hope that helps.

        Liked by 1 person

    • You’re very welcome. With poetry I’ve noticed it’s very easy to overuse certain formatting devices (like indentation). Naturally you should be careful about structuring your piece–it should be expressing something real–but you should be extra careful about employing too many “tricks”.

      One thing I love to use when I type is ellipses, “…”, so I have to constantly fight the urge to fill all my poems with them! haha.

      Awareness of your literary tics is an important part of creating decent work.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I also appreciate the ambiguity left to our devices to discern its possible meanings, here. It makes it so much more thought-provoking to not have everything spelled-out for us, and to leave the mystery in its meaning based on our own interpretations.

    Liked by 1 person

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